the brokeness is over!

...but is regular sleep over too??

I finally did it, I finally obtained myself some employment that will pay all the bills I have leftover from the last time I had employment that paid my bills. I am your friendly neighborhood waitress once again - lookin' cute and serving out the drinks and the meals.

Pros:
-makin' the moneyz. payin' the bills.
-a job that works around my school schedule
-if i need to switch something up, i'll be able to switch with a coworker
-it's located about midway between the triangle that is my house, my lover's house, and school.
-i'm ridiculously good at this....i think.

Cons:
-serving again, i'm hoping the customer quality will be better at this restaurant
-sometimes i get tired of catering to someone's every whim
-it will take some time to get back up to the level of energy it takes to do this
-i'd rather stick to office work, cuz serving food gets messy sometimes.

I'm very excited, cuz while i do currently maintain an office job on campus that i love, it pays nowhere near enough to pay my bills. i'm really tired of getting calls from my creditors - believe me, i would pay you all if i had the money. and now i can finally get my credit score back up to where it was.

I've spent the last eight months stressing, crying, ignoring, fighting bouts of depression over where the next $100 was going to come from to put food in my mouth and gas in my car to get to the next interview and maintain the carefree-looking lifestyle i had acquired. i've hid my despairs quietly and then spilled guts to my closest friends when i couldn't keep my fears to myself. i've tried to escape into delirious highs in order to pass the unemployed time and feel better just for a little while. i almost called my ex-boyfriend because i thought he cursed me to this jobless doom. My life was still relatively sweet, but not paying your bills, not having any savings, and worrying about the next dollar sucks. it sucks ass.

So thank Jesus. I finally charmed the pants off someone just enough for them to give me a chance and hire me on the spot.

I'm a little afraid because I anticipate living out of my car as I will constantly be shuttling between my home, school, work at school, my lover's home, and this new job. I treasure my rest and I definitely want to pass this quarter so I'm wondering how I will fit rest and studying/homework in. And I don't see my family too much as it is. Also, I have a side project going on that I'm helping with that I really don't want to fall by the wayside. Plus, besides those annoying phone calls (NOTE: do not EVER put your cell phone number on a credit card application. They will call you all fuckin' day long.), I've kinda gotten used to floating by on the small reserves of cash I've been able to get a hold of, and its going to take a while to get up to the level of energy it's going to take to maintain the crazy college schedule I've created for myself. And I won't quit my school job, cuz I need the office experience on my resume, and my job is super cool.

Fuck this shit, I just gotta do it. Wish me luck.